Dear Friend,
I have
known for some time now that if I were to move into a
house/apartment/trailer/castle or whatever it may be with a girl(imaginary or
real) that I would prefer to have separate rooms. (Preferably in close
proximity) I came to this conclusion
without taking a practical stance on the issue; it was purely feeling
philosophy at the time.
I think that couples too often
compromise self when intertwined in a serious relationship. They tend to assimilate to the person’s desires
and lose sight of the qualities that once made them unique. I myself can attest to this, and have watched
numerous others do the same.
Your room isn’t just a place to
sleep and store your stuff; it’s the material manifestation of your
personality. You decide the color, the
flow, how to decorate the walls. Your
room is your sanctuary and you should never have to give it up no matter how
old or what stage of the relationship you’re in.
I think the ability to miss someone
is often overlooked when assessing the beauty of relationships. Time to reflect and reminisce only add to your
next encounter. The feeling of longing accompanies you like a shadow with
anticipation or excitement.
Now the romantic might be quick to
combat a proposal of arranged sleeping separation, which is usually reserved
for the aftermath of oral bouts. (or in some cases physical) However, I would propose this with romance in
mind. Imagine your significant other
knocking on your door with a bowl of popcorn and a few movies, requesting a
slumber party. Or severe weather is
frightening you to the point where you can’t sleep, so you sneak into your
partner’s room to snuggle. The
possibilities for cuteness are endless!
After reading “Dreamland: Adventures
in the science of sleep” by David Randall I have some practical reasons to
support room separation. Women suffer
more from a shared bed because they are lighter sleepers and aren’t proned to
parasomnia like their counterparts. In
an experimental study, researchers surveyed participants if they were getting
better sleep with or without their new partner.
A majority of the couples answered: with their partner, when the length of
their brain waves observed while sleeping would say otherwise. Sharing a bed with someone is a relatively
new idea and has quickly become the social norm. When asking new couples why they share room
together the most frequent answer was: because that’s what you’re supposed to
do. Consistent quality REM sleep keeps
the mind stable leading to a healthier relationship all around.
It is predicted that by 2016 more than half
the houses built in the U.S. will have split master bed rooms. So maybe my thinking isn’t as intuitive as I
thought, regardless where do you lie? ( puns!)
Sincerely,
Tales
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